Where's my big girl panties?!

Alright, I promise my next post will have pictures, but I just need to let myself breath a little here. Since May I have been enjoying not going to school and working and things like that, but I'm starting to go a little stir crazy. Good thing school starts in January.. right?! And photography. I love it, but sometimes I compare my work to others a little too much and it kills my self esteem. I don't know why but the past few days I have been somewhat freaking out about all of it.

It's like all of a sudden I'm doubting everything.  I recently changed my mind about what I'm going into, was that really the right thing? What if I've lost all of my smarts?! What if I miss home?! What if I can't do everything as well I need to?! What if, what if, what if?! It's been plaguing my mind for the past few days and yes I'm excited to go, but what if I can't find my big girl panties and get over all these fears in time?

I think I'm not really used to the idea of being away from home and trying to figure everything out on my own and it has definitely overwhelmed me.

But today as I thought of all these little freakouts I started to think about the gospel. And I realized that yes, I can freak out, but I have the gospel in my life. I have the true restored gospel. What an empowering sentence. I have that. I don't need to figure that out for myself, because I know it's true. I know the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is the only true church on the earth at this time. I know that the scriptures are true and prayer is real; and in the midst of all those freakout moments, I can find peace through prayer and through the scriptures. I'm so grateful for this gospel.

"I have a lot of growing up to do, I realized that the other day in my fort"

"Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be" -George Sheehan

"If you are not willing to look stupid, nothing great is ever going to happen to you" -Dr. Gregory House

"All great changes are preceded by chaos"

"Life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful"

So yes, I've been freaking out, but I'm feeling OK now- I just needed to have a little rant blog. I'm excited to go, I know it's time to go, and I know this is what I'm supposed to be doing. 

And don't worry, I found my panties, turns out I was wearing them all along :)